Strength...and catching up!

One of my biggest pet peeves through this whole loss has been when people tell me how "strong" I am. I did a post about it here. It always bothers me because while I know people have good intentions, it doesn't make much sense to me because I never really CHOSE to be strong in the first place. I didn't make that choice. It was either be that or kill myself or crawl in a hole and never come out again. I hate the people who have never lost a child and they hear about what you went through and utter, "Oh my god, I couldn't even imagine...I don't think I could go on!" Well, I have news for you. You CAN go on and like it or not, the days and years pass, you keep living and life continues, so you have to trudge through as best as you can (unless you really DO kill yourself, but that's another post all together, isn't it?). To get to my point, I saw this quote on Facebook and thought it was so true: "Perhaps strength doesn't reside in having never been broken, but in the courage required to grow strong in the broken places." ~ author unknown. So that's my two cents about "strength". Most of the time, people say that to me and I want to punch them in the face. But, I usually smile and say thanks and then wish them bad things behind their backs. :-)  haha. 


On to the latest. Last time I posted was the day I ended up having Adam! I'm pleased to say that he is here and safe and most of all healthy!!! It was a few hours after I posted that post about how nervous I was. We got a call from my doctor informing us his lungs were mature and we were instructed to check into the hospital. I cannot tell you how relieved I was. Mentally, the entire pregnancy had been nerve wracking. Silly me thought that since Joshua was born, it might have been easier, but nope. It wasn't. If anything, I was even more anxious to have ANOTHER loss because I know multiple losses can occur. I'm not naive anymore. One thing I noticed was my doctors seemed to think since Joshua was home, what was the point of worrying and extra monitoring, etc. I'm not sure if that's what they really did think, but I got that impression, at least from my MFM. I swear that I saw him more often with Joshua than I did with Adam. But, Adam is here. He was born at: 7:42 p.m., 6 lbs. 10 oz. and 19.5 in. long. He weighed just a little less than his brother, but he was also a little longer! Here is a picture of the latest man in my life. :-)  Will post more later.